Love and other drugs (Patrick)

[mooka]

"Now kids remeber drugs and alcohol  are dangerous things that can corrupt the senses and damage you're body. Now what's the motto?"

"Say no to drugs!" The classroom yelled out in unison. Yes it was a corny presentation, there was only
so much second graders could take in without being distracted. 

The woman smiled and turned off the overhead projector just in time as a bell rang. The kids scrambled out of their seats and rushed out the doors outside to recess. A light headed boy grinned as a darker one ran after him while wiping his glasses
on his shirt. "Ed wait up!" he wailed.

"Sorry Max." He slowed down to a walk to wait for his friend as he pushed the classes up on his nose and sighed happily. "Wasn't that awesome Ed! I learned so much! We got to promise not to do any of that bad stuff."

Edison snorted and sat down on a swing shaking his head. "Yeah yeah Max, just relax a bit! We already have our plan in setI won't ruin it for us! We have to be the first people to Mars!"

The other boy grinned sat next to his friend and stuck out his hand. "Pinky promise?"

The two hooked fingers and shook them. "Pinky promise."
------
The body is a funny thing. It is you but it isn't at the same time. Yes you control it but most of the time it knows better than you and does all the hard work for you. It protects you from disease, allows motion, and knows when enough is enough. Your body is made for survival, but lots of time people abuse their body and don't listen when it screams at you to stop.

The bar wasn't too packed today, which was normal considering it was only five in the afternoon. There was hardly anyone there, just a few people relaxing and waiting for the night rush. A group of old men were sitting at a booth enjoying themselves with some food and discussing their busy days at work. There were also a few younger women chatting happily in the corner before going out for a night on the town. A few employees were sipping Dow the counters and checking inventory and the bar seemed like a fairly normal situation. But like always there has to be an oddity, and that oddity was Edison.

He was sitting alone in the center of the bar with a drink in one hand and a cigaret in the other. He sat slumped over an ash tray looking quite bitter. His hair was a mess and he had a small beard beginning to form on his face. His eyes were a bright red and bags hung under his eyes. He gullpped down the remainder of his drink before slaing it down onto the counter. " 'Nother one."

A younger bartender frowned at him. "Sir don't you think you've had enough already?"

Edison scowled at him and shook his head. "I'm paying you aren't I? Get me another damn drink!"

"Fine."The bartender sighed but couldn't complain and went to refill his drink.

Edison had always turned to mind numbing activities when he was hurting. He wasn't good at talking and it definatly didn't make him feel any better. Why he was drinking today you may ask? Well that was simple: relationship problems.

This had been his first relationship with someone and he hadn't known what to expect, but he liked being in one. Yet it put a lot of pressure on him. He wanted to keep this going and thought he could easily mess it up. So, against his normal nature, he had been kind and understanding with Patrick to make sure he wasn't the one creating any problems, but it hadn't worked out so well. So now he was stuck and no idea what to do next, but he felt all of this was his fault. Now he was turning to alcohol to drown his problems. Not the best choice, but the only one he could think of.

[tessa]

"Mom..." Patrick whined, looking out his livingroom window with a book sitting on his lap. He sighed, pouted, and rolled his black eyes towards his mother. She was a nice lady with timeless features and doting eyes towards her son.

"Yes, son?" she asked, though the tone in her voice suggested he knew what his next question would be. She watched her ten-year-old son lean back on the couch and sigh forlornly.

"How come I can't go to school like normal?"

"Honey, we're vampires. Vampires can't be with humans..."

"Dad's a human." Patrick pouted. His mother put her knitting down and placed her hand on his knee.

"Yes, and we had to move because of it. Remember? When you were four and those people came to our house and burned it down?" He nodded solemnly, "and daddy got shot? do you remember?" Patrick nodded again.

"So...all human's are bad?"

"No darling. But most are misled, and do mean things to us out of fear. If you go to school and they find out you're a Vampire, they will hurt you. They think we eat them, but we don't. Do you remember why?"

"Because human blood will make us crazy if we have too much."

His mother nodded, "yes. It is like a drug. Drug's are bad, Patrick, and if it's offered to you you call me and come home right away, do you understand?"

"Yes mom."

His mother smiled fondly at him, "Good. Now... let's hear some French."

"Oui Mama."

---

It wasn't long after that his mother was killed in a car wreck, and he was left to the care of his father who, despite his unconditional love for his son, couldn't quite understand his attraction to men. His father died of natural causes, leaving Patrick to a life of doing whatever the hell he damned well felt like which included a binge in drinking human blood. He posed as a donor clinic nurse and, in times of surplus, would drink the blood they didn't really need. Or so he convinced himself to quell his inner guilt.

As he grew he became more and more unpopular with whoever he came into contact with, and decided to pester an old 'witch'. This woman cast a demon on him which effectively scrambled his brain and altered his generally pleasant demeanor...when he wasn't high on human's blood of course. In that case he was as pleasant as pleasant can be, almost Sage-like. But the demon had left its mark, both physically and mentally. And so had Edison.

He rubbed his freshly shaved face and looked into the mirror at a happier Patrick. His body looked healthier; he had a reason to care, and to groom himself properly. He even felt happier. He had happier thoughts, a better disposition on life. He just felt...better.


But even so, he sighed in frustration. He'd hurt him and he knew it. But he was too damned proud to admit it! The thought or apologizing just raked it's nails down his spine and made him cringe. But the thought of losing Edison turned him into a lost, blubbering idiot, as if his whole world was everything Edison. Sure, Patrick could be a little possessive. Who wasn't around their boyfriend, right? Bullshit, he thought, you little prick. You're just the jealous type!

He pushed himself away from the counter and grabbed his coat; he knew exactly where to find Ed.

People gave Patrick an odd look as he burst into the bar but didn't react beyond that; the game was on. He slid onto a stool beside his boyfriend and flagged the bartender down. "Another round of whatever he's having; on me." he said with a suave grin. The bartender nodded, and left them. Patrick waited until he returned with the drinks and he finished his first when he turned to Edison.

"How come you didn't call today?" he said suddenly. "I know you're mad at me but I've been..." he sighed and averted his gaze back to the wooden counter, "worried. Can you... well, will you please talk to me about it?"

[mooka]

As the door slammed open he cast a sideway glance towards the bar's entrance, even though he already knew who it was. He could tell who it was by his scent and his footsteps. Was that weird? He hoped not, he was just trying to be protective of someone he cared about.

Edison scowled and looked down at his empty glass while Patrick ordered more drinks. He couldn't help bit grin, wishing he could see the bartender's annoyed face. But the next thing that Patrick said caused him to grip his glass tightly, making his knuckles white.

"I didn't call you because I was...preoccupied." With beer, no he just didn't know what to say if he did call, phones were really hard to communicate emotions. Besides, he had lost his phone who knows where last night. It was probably hidden under crap somewhere in his apartment or maybe a lucky hobo was ordering pizzas on it. 

"I'm not mad at you Patrick." He truely wasn't. "But worried?" he hiccuped. "You've never been worried before. What did you think I was doing here? Meeting someone else?" he rubbed his forehead and shook his head gently. Unfortunately  Edison had no idea what someone that was trying to help him looked like.

"Talking? We don't talk! You sound just like my damn sister! Who are you trying to be? Not yourself!" he slammed his glass onto the counter and finally looked at Patrick as the room fell silent. "Never mind Patrick I just want to be alone and get my mind calmmed down." He slid out of his chair and grasped the counter to steady himself before wobbling outside, wishing he could run because Patrick was probably going to follow after him.

Edison inhaled sharply as the sunlight hit him and he tried to cover his eyes but the light still made his head hurt. He pushed his legs to move him as quickly as they could to get him away from Patrick. He knew he would say something he shouldn't and things could get ugly in an instant, and he didn't want that, no matter how many times he denied saying he cared about Patrick. Of course he was lying, hiding his feelings like he always did.

[tessa]

Patrick rolled his eyes skyward and shook his head. What was he saying, that Patrick had changed? Well of course he had changed! He did something to the person he loved that had hurt them, and if anything warranted a change it was that. It took a long time for him to realize that he felt bad for hurting Edison and Sage, and that he didn't just apologized because he got into trouble for it, but when he finally realized it he was utterly sick with himself. He truly wanted to make sure it never happened again and, though he would never tell anyone, he was seeking help to stop his urges of invading peoples minds. Apparently, according to the local Vampire Elder, the more he did it the more he wanted to, and the more he wanted to the less likely he would be able to control himself, etcetera, etcetera. It was like a disease, or a nasty drug. In the simplest terms, Patrick had become a junky. If his mother was still alive she would string him by his ears and scold him until they both turned grey, which took a long time for Vampires. Patrick left some money on the counter and pushed himself out of his seat.

He followed his love out of the bar, staying close in case Edison took a nasty fall. He didn't say a single word, seeing as his boyfriend was drunk as a skunk. He would forgive him this time but if Patrick stopped doing drugs, Edison would have to stop getting shitfaced, and that was final, he thought with a mental nod of his head. Patrick knew, though he hadn't had too many relationships, that there would have to be compromises in a healthy relationship and there would be arguments and hurt feelings sometimes. But he fully intended to work through it all. Besides, if Edison had wanted the same old Patrick he should have never gotten rid of the demon. If he was mad at the change in the Vampire, he had only himself to blame for making Patrick's life a little bit less retched every day.

He placed a steadying hand on his boyfriend's shoulder,

"I'm parked around the corner." he said, "I'm not going to let you hobble off on your own. Not in the condition you're in."

He had promised not to get into any arguments with the man in this state but if they had it any other time the feelings would have died down and Patrick wouldn't want to talk about it, and the issue would just sit there and fester and grow into something uncontrollable, or beyond fixing. A heated discussion now versus a breakup later? Patrick knew which one he would rather face.

"I wasn't worried you were running around cheating on me, you know." he said, a little more grouchy than he had hoped. He winced, "I mean...I was actually worried about you, Ed. I know you've been doing this and I worry about it. Wouldn't you worry about me if I disappeared and you couldn't get a hold of me?" he asked rhetorically, partly afraid of the answer Edison would give him. Frustrated anger bubbled up in the pit of his stomach and his jaws ached from the clenching of his teeth.

"We need to talk." he said, "We need to sit down and figure this out, it's what adults in relationships do. I don't like the thought of it anymore than you do," he added hastily, "but I know it's right. Like when your mother forced you to take cold medicine when you're sick? You don't want to, but it will make you feel better and you know it, so you pinch your nose and you just..." he sighed defeatedly, "You just do it. I hate talking about emotions as much as you do, and you know it. But we have to, Edison. We have to trust each-other enough to be able to do that without getting embarrassed."

His anger subsided, and now all he felt like doing was curling up into Edison's arm's and dying.

"Please, Ed?"

[mooka]

Right now he was having an internal conflict of his own. His drunken side was screaming at him and making his somewhat normal side shrink in fear. He wanted desperatly to fix things with Patrick and just o on happily with him, but at the moment he couldn't quite rap his head around apologizing or talking things out.

He flinched as he felt Patrick's hand  on his shoulder and spun around to look at him groggily. "I didn't know you had a car." he smiled gently, thinkingthat he should just go home with his boyfriend and just sleep off the alcohol before talking this over. "Yeah I know," he rested his head on the other man's shoulder."I've been worried about you too..." But his drunkself snapped.

"Talk? Talk!" he moved away from him and stared at Patrick with disbelief and shook his head, which he regretted. "Like adults? So you're saying that I'm acting like a kid? Well I'm sorry that I'm new at this, but you haven't helped out this situation anymore than I have!" he pushed at Patrick's chest which probably did more damage to him as he nearly lost his balance. "I don't want to fucking talk right now!"

He staggered back into a run but he stopped short too out of breath. "But I do trust you!" he wailed stalking back to Patrick, balling his hands into fists. "Are you embarrassed of me, because I'm not embarrassed by you!" he sobbed gently and clutched his head with his hands as the world began to spin around him, seeding his mind even more off track. He winced as his fingers turned sharp and dug into his skin.

"Patrick you don't understand how hard I'm trying here...but it's not working. Or maybe it is...I can't tell anymore!" his body seemed to burst into smoke and filtered down onto the ground in a small pile before building itself back up into the familiar dripping form of a demon. "Why can't I be perfect Patrick? Can't you tell me?" he lurched towards his beloved and stroked an elongated finger down the side of his  face. Edison leaned his head in towards his ear and prssed his body against Patrick's."I need you one way or another Pat..." the black goo began to latch onto his skin and pull him in closer.

[tessa]

Patrick froze. He was scared. He had never been scared of Edison, but now he was terrified. He should have felt betrayed, but then he felt as if he'd deserved it a little. Edison wouldn't really hurt him, would he? Patrick's eyes darted around in fear. Should he run? Run to what? He had nothing. He was alone, and had only one thing that mattered to him and that thing was about to swallow him whole. He kept his arms to his side and ignored the people staring at them. Lesson learned; let Edison calm down first.

"You are perfect, my love. You're mine, and I love you. Everything about you is perfect, to me." he said calmly as the gooey monster clung to him. Every instinct told him to run, but the love he had for Edison kept him there. Was he going to die today?

"Two perfect people can come together and have a relationship with problems as much as us. It needs work, and trust. I trust you more than I've ever trusted anyone before Edison," he continued his voice quavering now, "I will do anything so our relationship survives and if that means asking the hard questions and getting my hands dirty, and risking you getting mad at me and going all 'creature from the black lagoon' on my ass, then so be it."

He was feeling claustrophobic and he couldn't keep his panic from keeping his breath short. He quivered in Edison's...goop, and closed his eyes, tilting his head up to the sky.

"Edison if you do this it will kill me. Please don't... please! I don't want to die, especially not if you kill me. You don't know how much I hated myself for killing my last boyfriend. It's not something I ever want you to experience. But please, don't do this. For fucks sake Ed!"

He squirmed now, his panic taking over in a flurry of emotions. He reached into Edison's mind with his own, using his powers like a fist to grip his brain, to stall him or hold him back, but he felt as if her were losing control. He had to trust Edison but he didn't know if he should. Patrick squirmed even more and tried desperately to escape, sticking his foot out and pulling away with all his available strength but it was in vain.

"Edison STOP!"

[mooka]

Edison frowned sadly as Patrick quivered, he could feel every movement of the man, his heart beat, his sweat, everytime he blinked. The creature paused and continued to stroke his face. "You don't want to be with me forever? We wouldn't hve to worry about any of these problems that humanoids have..." It shook it's head sadly before continuing on at his plees.

"Kill you? No my dear I wouldn't do that, maybe your body will die but your soul will be with me forever." the thing hissed out in pain as something made his head shake with pain and he pulled away from the man and where the pain was coming from. It blinked slowly before bursting once again but this time back into a human form, unfortunately this one didn't have any clothes on. Edison stared in disbelief at Patrick as he regained his thoughts and groaned, clinging to Patrick. "I'm so sorry!" he wailed, burying his head in the man's chest. "I've been such a horrible boyfriend! I should have just listened to you and talked it out, but I'm not so good at that...but I almost ate you!" he sobbed loudly.

This whole scene must of looked extremely odd to the people passing by, but he was too upset to care.

"You have the full right to dump me you know! Find someone who actually listens and isn't a babbling drunk!"

[tessa]

He didn't want to make Edison upset. But Patrick was genuinely scared. "No, Edison, no!" he yelled, almost furiously, but to his surprise and utter relief, the monster inside his boyfriend disappeared, leaving a naked man to cling to him. Which he took as a rather large added bonus.

Patrick sighed, tears brimming in his eyes as demon Edison let him go. Demon Edison was a terrifying thing to see, but at least he knew it could be shocked out of him. Patrick felt as if all the life had been sucked out of him, and his arms and legs had become noodles, but he was relieved. He held Edison close, stroking his back gingerly with his knuckles, kissing his head. He shook gently, but locked his knees in place.

After all they had gone through, he couldn't help but notice Edison was naked. He couldn't help but look at him.


"You have the full right to dump me you know! Find someone who actually listens and isn't a babbling drunk!"


"I am not dumping you, Edison. Didn't you hear what I said?" he asked, shedding his coat and tying it around his waist. He took his hand and led him around the corner to where the car was, opening the door and ushering him inside.

((Sorry for the shortness))

[mooka]

"Not really..." he had heard some stiff, the most important things. They needed to set some guidelines in order to keep being together, which each seemed at least willing to do, even though it would be hard. They were both two crazy individuals that needed some desperate help that only the other could help with.

Edison's checks lit up as Patrick wrapped his coat around him. He didn't want to see any reactions of any of the people around them. They could be left to wonder about the crazy couple till the cows came home.

He let Patrick lead him to the car, which he didn't know he had, and sat down quietly, staring out the window absentmindedly. He was still trying to process everything that had happened, what had set him off so badly, he couldn't remeber. It was probably some stupid nonsense like always.

Edison curled himself into a ball and sighed gently as he glanced over to Patrick sadly. "I don't deserve you, or anyone at that matter, I'm too...crazy, unstable for you o stay safe. I-I almost killed you. Isn't that a scary thought?" he drew a breath. "I don't want you to get hurt, or feel sad or responsible or any negative emotions!"

[tessa]

Patrick pulled out of the parking lot and onto the road, towards Edison's house. He had the heat on so Edison didn't get cold, not that Patrick needed the heat fan to feel warm in the small little car. He couldn't help but steal glances of the man in the mirror. Edison was...stunning. Patrick couldn't help but look, and chided himself for it. How inappropriate! Oggling this man when he needed his help. The man set his eyes back on the road, steering steadily, his mind whirling.

What was Edison saying? Did he want him to leave? A sick feeling settled in his stomach like a hot stone. He kept his mouth shut and concentrated on driving as rain spattered the windshield, prompting the automatic wipers into motion. He came to a gentle stop at a red light and relaxed his grip on the wheel, giving Edison a sad look. He wasn't wearing his fedora, and his clean cut brown hair was beaded in sweat or rain, it could have been either. But his shirt was drenched in whatever it was, and his arms were still shaking.

"I don't deserve you, or anyone at that matter, I'm too...crazy, unstable for you o stay safe. I-I almost killed you. Isn't that a scary thought? I don't want you to get hurt, or feel sad or responsible or any negative emotions!"

Patrick inhaled and exhaled a measured amount, stepping on the gas pedal as the light turned green, his turn signal clicking loudly in the silence he had allowed to settle. He hung a right, and waited until they were at another stoplight to turn fully to Edison.

"I know very well what you are Edison, and what you can do to me if you get into a mood." he said, having mixed emotions, "and it's a risk I'm bloody well willing to take. Do you know what 'unconditional' means?" he said, snapping back to the windshield as the line of traffic began to move again. He drove for a little longer, his emotions catching up to him.

"I'm going to take you home and you're going to get dressed and sleep this off. We will talk in the morning, because I don't think we should try that again until we're both calmed down. I don't want to talk about it, actually. I don't even want to think about you almost killing me."

He went on to say, as if speaking to himself. Patrick shook his head. "We won't even talk about it." He said as he turned into the driveway. He sat in the drivers seat and tapped on the wheel nervously. He didn't even want to think about it. It scared him, he was going to hide from it as much as he could.

"We're okay."